jokes

White_Lightning · **Posted:** Thu May 02, 2002 5:34 pm

Two Scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the scousers ask him for a lift. He tells them that he has no room in the wagon as he is
carrying 20,000 bowling balls but will take a look at the bike for them.

He tries everything he knows but is unable to repair it. Time is getting on now and he's late for his delivery so he tells the scousers he has to leave. The scousers put it to the driver that if they can manage to fit in the back with the 20,000 bowling balls, will he take them, so he agrees. They manage to squeeze themselves and their motorbike into the back of the wagon so the driver shuts the doors and gets off on
his way. By this time he is really late and so puts his foot down.

Sure enough PC Plod of Greater Manchester Police pulls him up for speeding. The good officer asks the driver what he is carrying to which he
replies with sarcasm " Scouse eggs". The policeman obviously doesn't believe this so wants to take a look. He opens the back door and quickly shuts it and locks it. He rushes back to his cruiser and gets onto his radio and calls for immediate backup from as many officers as possible. The dispatcher asks
what emergency he has that he requires so many officers. "I've got a wagon with 20,000 Scouse eggs in it - 2 have already hatched and the f*ckers have managed to nick a motorbike already".

............................................................................................................
News Flash - Ferrari Hires Scousers as Pit Crew

The Ferrari F1 Team recently fired the whole Pit-Crew to employ
some young unemployed youths from Liverpool.

The decision to hire them was brought on by a documentary on
how unemployed youths in the Liverpool area can remove a set of car wheels in less
than four seconds without proper equipment.
This was thought to be a good move as most races are won and
lost in the pits these days and Ferrari would have an advantage.

However Ferrari soon encountered a major problem. Not only were
the lads changing the tyres in under four seconds, but within 10 seconds
they had resprayed, re-numbered and sold the vehicle to the McLaren team.

this one is of bad taste but is not ment to cause offence

APPARENTLY PRINCE CHARLES HAS REFUSED TO EAT CURRY EVER AGAIN!

THE LAST TIME HE ORDERED ONE,BY THE TIME IT ARRIVED,HIS FUC,KING NAN! WAS STONE COLD!

Peter reid and their lass are out shopping when he suddenly passes out, a passer by comes to help and they carry him into the nearest shop which happens to be a building society, when he comes round he asks where am I, his wife replys dont worry love your in the Nationwide he replys fu.ck me is it August already !!.

((-&E-)) · **Posted:** Fri May 03, 2002 5:58 pm

LOL.. they are well FUNNY !!!!!!! Laughing

Ami · **Posted:** Fri May 03, 2002 9:32 pm

haha,

((-&E-)) · **Posted:** Fri May 03, 2002 9:59 pm

White_Lightning · **Posted:** Sat May 04, 2002 9:53 am

ITs alreet mate i could never really take this piss out of out yorkshire folk anyway cos i was born in leeds like (i moved when i was 2 though, so it doesnt really count).

plus im going to live there in september (in kirkstal or something like that). anyway the scouse diserve it, theiving ba.stards!!!!